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About

Built in a front office, not a boardroom.


Offsider exists because running two local businesses teaches you exactly where the revenue leaks, and eventually you get tired of watching it happen.

The story

The founder runs two bricks-and-mortar businesses in Sandgate, Brisbane: Ako Martial Arts, a family BJJ and grappling academy, and Iremia Recovery, a bathhouse with sauna, cold plunge, magnesium pools and compression.

Both live on bookings. Both have a phone that rings while everyone is busy, an inbox of enquiries that deserve fast answers, staff who face hard conversations at the desk, and a hundred small processes that only work if they are written down.

Every product on this site exists because it fixed a real problem in that front office. The missed call textback answers our real phone. The training product drills our real staff on our real policies. The playbooks run our real venues. When you buy from Offsider, you are buying the version that already had to work.

An offsider, in Australian English, is the person who works alongside you: the tradie's second pair of hands, the one watching the things you cannot. That is the job description.

What we hold ourselves to

Operator first

We sell what we run. If a tool is not good enough for our own front desk, it is not good enough to sell.

Plain numbers over adjectives

Under $20 a month to run. 5 milliseconds on a cached greeting. Real figures, or no figures.

Honest about the gaps

What is not built yet is stated on the page, including on the pages that sell. Our AI's production mistakes are published, with their fixes.

You own your stuff

Your site, your content, your prompt, your playbooks. Leaving should be easy. That is what keeps us honest month to month.

Those standards are not a mood board. They are written down, dated and reviewed on The Offsider Standard page, so you can hold us to them.

Come and say gidday

Sandgate, Brisbane. Serving service businesses Australia-wide. The first conversation is fifteen minutes and costs nothing.

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